Are We a Fit?
Are We a Fit?
Thinking about working with me?
Dope.
I want to make the best use of our time by being extra clear about who this work is specifically for.
The short story is that I help BIPOC and Queer leaders align their liberatory values with their liberatory actions (especially when self-doubt is the cause for the discrepancy).
Here’s the long story:
Are we destined to work together?
If the universe algorithm destines us to work together, then we have a few of these things in common…
You’re the kind of person who loves…
- movies like The Matrix and The Truman Show (and sees how they relate to the world as it is)
- books about science fiction like The Parables Series by Octavia E. Butler or Lakelore by Anna Marie McLemore
- books about healing like You Are Your Best Thing by Tarana Burke + Brené Brown or The Body is Not an Apology by Sonya Renee Taylor or
- books about social change like Emergent Strategy by adrienne maree brown or Rest is Resistance by Tricia Hersey
- using words like ‘nonprofit industrial complex’ or ‘righteous anger’ or ‘housing is a human right’ or ‘eat the rich’
- staying home whenever possible
- leaning on the-powers-that-be, the universe and/or ancestors for guidance
- the idea of living off the land with your peoples sounds hella enticing, but you aren’t fully bought into it cause it could get culty, real quick
Now that we got that out of the way, let’s get into the deeper stuff.
Why do we even try?
Me and you give a shit about people and the planet.
We often talk about collective liberation as the way we describe our care for people and the planet.
You’re someone who has experienced your own form of injustice, harm and trauma, given your own marginalized identity.
People like us are not strangers to feeling like we don’t belong in a world that puts social constructs like race, class, gender, sexuality, ability, size, and more, into a hierarchy where you and I are not at the top.
Despite all that we’ve experienced, it’s our ability to see that another future is possible, that has led us to join others in the fight for social justice in our personal and professional lives.
For me, that possibility of another future led me to enter the nonprofit sector with a big personal vision. Back then, I wanted to change the world. I’m pretty sure I thought I had a magic mushroom or the secret that no one else had considered.
After I learned about the patriarchy, White supremacy and capitalism, I wanted to do any and everything I could do to help stop this multi-headed monster that made my life so much harder.
What happens when your intentions don’t match your impact?
Back then, I thought the best place for me to do that social change work would be at a nonprofit. What I did not expect was that even though I was so passionate about these issues, I had no idea how to put that passion into action.
I had no idea how I, as an individual, could challenge patriarchy, White supremacy or capitalism. I had even less of an idea about how I could bring people together to challenge these things as a collective.
Naturally, I spent a lot of fucking time being frustrated and angry at my incompetence. I used to feel like such a phony, like I really wasn’t about all the shit I said I was about. It was awful.
If you’re anything like me, I imagine that it’s easy for you to extend kindness and compassion for everyone and they mama but it’s so much harder for you to extend that same understanding to yourself.
You might even resonate with the phrase: You got into this work to punch injustice in the face but here you are beating yourself up.
One moment that describes this contradiction
You might even resonate with this moment:
I want you to picture the last time you were asked for your opinion in front of a group of people.
Let’s say that what you had to share was the exact opposite of what everyone had shared already.
You feel conflicted.
Part of you wants to be honest with your opinion but you’re immediately flooded with questions like:
- What if people don’t like what I have to say?
- What if I have no idea what I’m talking about?
- What if people think less of me?
- What if no one understands what I’m trying to say?
- What if people don’t like me?
- What if my opinion is wrong or hurtful?
So what do you do?
You end up staying quiet. This is the other part of you that has learned to stay quiet for protection.
Staying quiet doesn’t quite feel like a choice for you but it’s what you know how to do. You’ve been doing it so long, it feels like second nature.
Maybe you feel some regret or shame afterward because you feel like you’re not being the person you say that you?
Maybe you spend some time thinking about what you coulda/ shoulda/ woulda said if you could turn back time?
I’ve landed in these places too.
I bet that deciding not to speak at that moment is your best course of action because at least you’re safe— life has taught you that you’ll be safer when people don’t know what you’re honestly thinking or feeling.
What happens when silence becomes a habit?
Here’s the kicker though.
When you learn that being silent is the best way to keep you safe, then anytime you want to speak up, you learn to doubt yourself.
If I were to ask you…
What do you think your life would look like if self-doubt wasn’t so front and center the way it is now?
Maybe you would say:
- I would stop censoring myself and show up, more fully.
- I could share more of my knowledge and experience, freely.
- I would make decisions faster and not be so worried about failing or making mistakes
- I would be making the change I want to see in the world.
- I would be more brave and bold.
All of these desires live in the land of being unapologetic and authentic AF (if you ask me).
How I might be able to help you
When I work with BIPOC and Queer leaders around navigating self-doubt, we’re working on developing the skills, supports and spirit of self-trust.
Self-trust is the ultimate kryptonite to self-doubt.
Self-trust is at the heart of Liberatory Leadership.
Why? So that wherever you go, you’ll access your own land of being unapologetic and authentic AF.
If you want to learn more about my philosophy and how I think about this, click the button below.
Learn about my philosophy around this
If all of this has resonated with you so far, let's work together!
You can apply to work with me 1-to-1 in a 3-month or 6-month coaching capacity by clicking the button below.